Having first hand experience with psychopaths, I have researched a lot about their behavior and traits and found strikingly close resemblance with those described in the articles. Therefore, I can say for sure that these kind of humans are lurking around you and me, because of which there is so much available to read on them in the internet. You need to identify them at the right time before that they start getting into your life like they have in my case. To my surprise, they are quite profound in number and once you are identified by them as a potential victim, it might get very difficult to get rid of them. Its like stepping on chewing gum.
If you find someone who has a sadistic kind of a behavior, be careful, they might be a psychopath. I have listed some of the common and worst kind of behavior that these people have. It is not to judge anyone but it will help you to identify and avoid them.
- Check their happiness quotient. These people usually are very unhappy about something that is going on in their lives or may be the way they are. It could be something related to their professional life, financial status, personal life, or may be their physical appearance. Notice that they have a 1000 regrets, not one or two. They assume that people are not nice to them because they are not blessed. They will blame God and other people, never their own laziness or incapability. They are highly insecure by nature and believe in competing with anyone and everyone, be it a toddler or a beautiful woman. They might fake being happy, manly or feminine. You may notice that they try to create those deep feelings of sadness artificially in other people either through their own actions or by simply creating that impression on the minds of their victims, even when nothing bad has actually happened. This has happened to me several times. If they get to know that you felt bad about your idea being stolen and sold to someone else, they will try to make you believe that it has happened several times in order to turn your peace into sadness and guilt. Their achievement is not just stealing your stuff, but to steal your happiness and not letting you be content and happy, if you become their victim.
- Are they breaching your personal space and trying to control your life? Check their tendency to get into things that shouldn’t matter to them. Are they checking your personal belongings like your bag, laptop, phone etc. in your absence? They try to take reins of their victim’s life, mostly because they are obsessed or don’t have control over their own lives. They take satisfaction in hampering others mostly a more emotional or weak victim’s life. Remember that they might go to any extent to do that. They might hack your mail accounts, send spyware to your computer or smartphone though ad cookies or emails. They will scan and monitor you bank accounts, social media accounts to get jealous about something and will try to steal any information they get.
- Do they lack empathy, mercy or any kind of human virtues? Psychopaths have no kindness towards any person or animal. They lack any feelings of loyalty or goodwill. They are backstabbers and are never sorry for doing anything very bad or criminal. If told about the qualities of mercy or loyalty, they get irritated or will make fun of that. Those basic feelings and virtues are completely wiped out and they have no regrets for that. That might be because the negative feelings are so strong in them. They will make business deals that are illegal and involving people’s emotions or good. If they get something from someone, that will make them jealous, not grateful. This state will never change. If they succeed in hampering somebody’s career or married life, they will celebrate with their kind of happiness. It is hard to imagine but such people do exist.
- Do they break rules, overlook work ethics or etiquette very frequently? Notice that they remind others of the rules at the workplace but are breaking it almost everyday for their own fabricated “valid” reasons. Harassing a team member or using others to do that by threatening or bribing. They know whom they can use and how. They are emotionally intelligent and know how to exploit others through their emotions and weaknesses. They feel they have lost the “game” if they are unable to do so. That is when they might get very nasty and dangerous.
- Is anyone trying to become your unofficial “Public Representative”? The psychopath will try to “manage” your career and personal life by talking to people on your behalf. They will propagate false agenda, will lie shamelessly about the victim. They will try to collect information about the victim from co-workers, friends and family members and will try to STEAL and deprive you of not just material belongings like job and money, but also relationships. They will stalk on you and get any personal information about a person and pass that on to that person saying that you told them that!! The intention is to spoil your relationship with others and isolate you at workplace and socially.
- They will try to multiply and spread their negativity. Sometimes they might use the communal card, sometimes their professional status, sometimes gender and what not. Know that they are excellent liars and deceptive by nature. If they know that it is shameful for any older person to swear lies about a much younger person and know that it is not common, they will take advantage of that and will act like they have a lot of self-prestige and respect and that they are talking ill not because they wish to destroy somebody’s career but they care about the other person and wish to give them useful tips out of generosity!!
- Check for signs of mental conditions. They are shrewd, manipulative and cunning. But they also exhibit signs of mental instability like over excitement for something that was won through manipulation, lying to themselves about things that they know are wrong. They might be very cold-blooded but their psychic condition might harm you or any other innocent person who never had anything to do with them.
- Making their victims the target of exploitation. If the psychopath was unable to do something wrong to you or USE you in a way, he/she might try to gratify their underlying wrath and frustration by provoking others to do that to you. They might be able to mint money or gain anything for themselves, but it gives them some kind of relief that they are seeking continuously.
It is not about judging someone unfairly. But as far as I have experienced, a psychopath can affect your life to a large extent and most importantly they are proud offenders with skills that can keep them covered and unpunished for a long time. They are not the normal, common bad people, they are obsessive and mad with no respect for anything positive. Never expect them to like you even if you are not a very nice person yourself. They succeed with the help of other people’s lack of experience with very bad people and growing numbness towards virtues. They know that it is easy to convince people to do wrong with bribes that could be money or an idea to make money or help in getting a promotion. They know that most women who pretend to be kind towards other women are actually faking it.
To fight such hidden social and professional evil, it is important to understand that we are social beings and it is not right to support psychopaths even if we are atheists. You never know how those bad actions come back to you and your family.